A Psychologist Reveals 8 ‘Cop-Outs’ People Use To Justify Infidelity

Infidelity is a common issue that affects many relationships, and it’s not uncommon for people to engage in behaviors that they know are wrong. But have you ever wondered how cheating partners justify their actions? A new study has shed some light on this topic, revealing eight “cop-outs” that people use to rationalize their infidelity.

The study, conducted by Dr. Laura J. Du Mond, a clinical psychologist and expert in relationships, surveyed over 100 individuals who had engaged in extramarital affairs. The participants were asked to provide reasons for their behavior, and the results were both surprising and enlightening.

According to Dr. Du Mond, “People often use cognitive distortions or ‘cop-outs’ to justify their infidelity. These cop-outs allow them to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and to shift the blame onto someone or something else.”

Here are the eight cop-outs that Dr. Du Mond identified in her study:

1. “My partner doesn’t meet my emotional needs, so I need to seek comfort elsewhere.” This cop-out suggests that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because their emotional needs are not being met within their relationship. However, this ignores the fact that relationships involve give-and-take and that it’s important to communicate one’s needs and work together to meet them.
2. “I was drunk/high and wasn’t thinking clearly.” This cop-out implies that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because they were under the influence of alcohol or drugs. However, this ignores the fact that people are still capable of making choices even when intoxicated, and that it’s important to take responsibility for one’s actions regardless of the circumstances.
3. “It didn’t mean anything/I didn’t feel anything for them.” This cop-out suggests that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because they didn’t have any emotional attachment to the person they were cheating with. However, this ignores the fact that an affair can still be hurtful and damaging to one’s partner, regardless of whether or not there was an emotional connection.
4. “I was trying to spice up my relationship/add some excitement.” This cop-out implies that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because they were trying to improve their relationship in some way. However, this ignores the fact that infidelity is not a healthy or respectful way to add excitement or variety to a relationship.
5. “My partner was neglecting me/paying more attention to someone else.” This cop-out suggests that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because they felt neglected or ignored by their partner. However, this ignores the fact that relationships involve ups and downs, and that it’s important to communicate one’s needs and work through challenges together.
6. “I didn’t mean to hurt anyone/I didn’t think anyone would find out.” This cop-out implies that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because they didn’t intend to hurt anyone or get caught. However, this ignores the fact that infidelity can still cause significant harm, even if it’s not intended or if it remains a secret.
7. “I was trying to prove something to myself/others.” This cop-out suggests that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because they were trying to prove something to themselves or others. However, this ignores the fact that infidelity is not a healthy or respectful way to prove one’s worth or abilities.
8. “It was just a mistake/an accident.” This cop-out implies that the cheating partner is not responsible for their actions because they were simply making a mistake or acting impulsively. However, this ignores the fact that infidelity often involves a series of choices and actions, and that it’s important to take responsibility for one’s mistakes and learn from them.

Dr. Du Mond notes that these cop-outs are not only unhelpful but also harmful. “They allow people to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and to continue engaging in damaging behaviors. It’s important to recognize and challenge these cop-outs in order to move forward and build healthier, more fulfilling relationships.”

In conclusion, the study conducted by Dr. Laura J. Du Mond highlights the various ways in which people justify their infidelity. These cop-outs may provide temporary relief or justification, but they ultimately prevent individuals from taking responsibility for their actions and moving forward in a positive direction. By recognizing and challenging these cop-outs, we can work towards building healthier and more respectful relationships.